Are you Holding on to Any Limiting Beliefs? If Paul can Overcome Limitations SO CAN YOU!

Let go of limiting beliefs. I have. So can you. 

Take courage and overcome obstacles and limiting beliefs.

Updated Post: Conquer Your Mt. Everest

Why Mt. Everest?

IMAGINE yourself climbing Mt. Everest. You  can see the summit in the distance when you collapse and there's no way you can go any further. You're completely spent. You have absolutely no more energy left, spiritually, emotionally, mentally, or physically. 

Out of the corner of your eye you see the Savior (He is there because you humbly and prayerfully invited Him) coming to your aid and He helps you reach the top. I believe we all have a "Mt. Everest" in our lives. At different periods in our lives sometimes our trials are mountains, or hills, or boulders and sometimes they're only annoying pebbles in our shoes. The only reason we make it to the top is due to our Savior's Atonement. There's no way we can make it on our own, nor should we even try. (But we all try to sometimes, don't we? ;) ) My Mt. Everest in my life right now is the bipolar mental illness that I have.

Let me be clear. I AM NOT bipolar. I HAVE a mental illness called bipolar disorder. This disease does not define who I am and I will never say that I am bipolar. My worth is infinite and divine. My value does not come from what I have, what I can do, but from who I am.

I am a daughter of a loving Heavenly Father.

I have had many promptings that I needed to start a blog about my experiences. One thing has stopped from taking this step is mainly

FEAR.

Hence, the pen name. This blog will be full of very real and raw emotions and I feel I can be more open with a pen name. But should my identity really matter? I don't usually share the fact that I have a mental illness with those that I meet or even some of my closest friends. I have learned the hard way that there are many misconceptions about mental illnesses in general. Hopefully, I can to dispel some of those myths. (September 29, 2015) For the past 5 years I have progressed on my healing journey to the point where I am not ashamed of my disease. It is not something that I need to hide. There are many misconceptions about mental illnesses and I cannot dispel those myths if I choose to hide. Today I am much more open about my disease. There are so many people who suffer, so many families who lives are affected by a family member's mental illness. I promise that your hurt will turn into hope, your despair into determination to fight against the disease, your pain into peace. My name is Amber Martin and I am not my disease.

I hope that through my writing I will be able to learn to trust my Savior by laying this burden at His feet and receive the healing that I desire. Elder Dallin H. Oaks has said,

"Healing blessings come in many ways, each suited to our individual needs, as known to Him who loves us best. Sometimes a “healing” cures our illness or lifts our burden. But sometimes we are “healed” by being given strength or understanding or patience to bear the burdens placed upon us."

I don't think that I will be healed in the way where I will no longer have this disease; but I believe that I will receive my healing through the understanding, patience, and ability to bear this burden with ease.

Please listen to this amazing song by Hilary Weeks called Beautiful Heartbreak . You'll love it. I promise.

It's the perfect ending to this post.

Blogspot You are Not my Friend

As you may have noticed, several photos on my blog have been removed courtesy of blogspot. Those were stock photos that I own. I am not happy with blogspot that they would just remove those photos without notice. I respect copyright laws. Any photos that I have used from simplehealthytasty.com I have received written permission from the blogger to use her photos on my own blog and referenced the website. (I love her food recipes and they are healthy & taste wonderful too!)

So, blogspot, you are not my friend and I will NOT recommend your company to others.

My Tribulation is my Refining Fire and Amazing Motivation, Privilege, and Opportunity to Exercise my Faith in Jesus Christ

1 Therefore being justified by faith, we have peace with God through our Lord Jesus Christ:

 2 By whom also we have access by faith into this grace wherein we stand, and rejoice in hope of the glory of God.

 3 And not only so, but we glory in tribulations also: knowing thattribulation worketh patience;

 4 And patience, experience; and experience, hope:

 5 And hope maketh not ashamed; because the love of God is shed abroad in our hearts by the Holy Ghost which is given unto us.

"The Hope of God's Light"

"I realize that it is part of our condition as mortals to sometimes feel as though we are surrounded by darkness. But even though we may feel lost that God promises to illuminate the way before us no matter how long it takes."

I was suicidal for an intensely long and painful year and a half. During this hell I fought like a lion to hold onto the thin thread of hope that my life would NOT always be like that. Also, during that time I receive proper medical attention and therapy. Eventually I decided that I was done thinking those thoughts, I refused to continue to entertain them and allow them to be a part of my life <-----which I was ONLY enabled to do so because of the medical help I received from qualified health professionals. I believe that God helps those who help themselves; He blessed my doctors and therapists with inspiration in knowing which course to take to best help me; He blessed me with the support of my family and extended family; He blessed me with a husband who rode valiantly through the storm with me even though it caused pain, worry and fears; He enabled me with the strength I needed to learn how to manage my illness and fight against the depression rather than letting the disease take over and rule my life.

I received the help I needed and therefore I made a subconscious decision that I was done thinking and entertaining those suicidal thoughts. I refuse to leave that legacy for my children. I choose instead to leave them a legacy of faith, of a mom who fights like a warrior against this disease until I hear those words when I meet my Maker, "Well done, thou good and faithful servant. Enter into My Kingdom. You are finally free at last!" I choose to live a long life. I choose to live into my 90's, God willing, and love my age and serve HIM with all my heart, mind, and soul.

If you are suicidal, don't try and handle this burden all on your own. Get medical help immediately. Tell someone, anyone. Tell a trusted friend or family member. There are support groups out there. You are not alone and never need to feel that way. Go to Nami.org and find a support group in your area.

I Needed to Read this Today

"Heavenly Father and His Beloved Son love all of God’s children no matter what they choose to do or what they become. The Savior paid the price of all sins, no matter how heinous. Even though there must be justice, the opportunity for mercy is extended which will not rob justice."

—Henry B. Eyring, "To My Grandchildren"
Topics: Atonement

'Nuff Said. (:

How we Change Behaviors to Become a Better Person

"We can change our behavior. Our very desires can change. How? There is  only one way. True change—permanent change—can come only through the  healing, cleansing, and enabling power of the Atonement of Jesus Christ."

--Russell M. Nelson, "Decisions for Eternity" Topics: Atonement

For things to change in my life, I MUST CHANGE. And I make permanent changes in my life through the "enabling power of the Atonement." I am successful with life changes when I rely on my Savior.

The HOPE of God's Light

 I know that by following this counsel my prayers will be more meaningful and I will feel even closer to my Father in Heaven.

Lift up your soul in prayer and explain to your Heavenly Father what you are feeling. Acknowledge your shortcomings. Pour out your heart and express your gratitude. Let Him know of the trials you are facing. Plead with Him in Christ's name for strength and support. Ask that your ears may be opened, that you may hear His voice."

—Dieter F. Uchtdorf, [read the whole article by clicking on the following link] "The Hope of God's Light"
Topics: Prayer, Trials

Turning AWAY from Bad Habits

"Do you find yourself hating what you are doing but not able to find the willpower to turn away from it? Then reach out and humble yourself. The Lord's enabling power is sufficient to change your heart, to turn your life, to purge your soul. But you must make the first move, which is to humble yourself and realize that only in God can you find deliverance."

—M. Russell Ballard, "Be Strong in the Lord"
Topics: Humility, Repentance

Sometimes that "hating what you are doing" is actually "hating yourself" and even the bad habits you turn to when you are depressed. I've already blogged about what my depressive habits are and you can read about those in this blog post ). When you are depressed it is hard to be "able to find the willpower to turn away from [whatever it is that you find yourself hating what you are doing]."

It may be hard, but the only way to receive help is through God's divine help. He will empower you to overcome anything. 

You will receive the ability 
                                              
                                         and power through HIM who 

                                                                                 is mighty to save.

Equally Yoked

This is our "castle" in the background.
 Actually this is Ben fiddling around
with that awesome program called Photoshop. LOL!

I desire for my husband and I to be equally yoked in our marriage. I know that he has felt that he was the one carrying all of the weight for the responsibilities of our family. I want him to feel supported, for our marriage to be free from contention, and for some more healing to take place. I know that some healing has already occurred. I am making deposits in our marital relationship banking account and I hope that my sweet husband can feel the difference. They have been small, but I am determined to be consistent and through the companionship of the Holy Ghost our bond with each other will grow stronger than it ever has been before.

"It is only with the companionship of the Holy Ghost that we can hope to be equally yoked in a marriage free from discord. I have seen how that companionship is crucial for felicity in a marriage. The miracle of becoming one requires the help of heaven, and it takes time."

—Henry B. Eyring, "To My Grandchildren"
Topics: Unity in Marriage, Happiness in Family Life, Companionship of Holy Ghost

The Sun is Still Shining!

The sun is still shining even when it's overcast and grey. I love the majesty and beauty of the sun's rays peeking through the clouds. It's like hope that peeks through the storms of depression. I've been borrowing my father-in-law's UV lamp that I affectionately call the happy lamp. It's been overcast, grey & dismal weather lately and I was willing to settle for some needed artificial sunshine!

A brief glimpse of the sun this afternoon!

Mighty Storms Beat Upon Us

Last night I couldn't sleep. The winds were around 80 mph and it was loud! I heard this crash and looked out the window to see this:

The remnants of the roof
of our neighbor's goat shed.

I couldn't believe it. That roof was heavy and recently built. The wood still looks new. I have done a close inspection but I know that it bent my metal trellis. 

Figuratively there are mighty storms in our lives and we need to strengthen our faith BEFORE the storm hits so that we will be able to be strong and withstand whatever is thrown in our path. A scripture in Helaman 5:12, from a book that was translated by our late prophet Joseph Smith, Jr. (The Book of Mormon), describes this perfectly,

"And now, my sons, remember, remember that it is upon the^arock of our Redeemer, who is Christ, the Son of God, that ye must build your ^bfoundation; that when the devil shall send forth his mighty winds, yea, his shafts in the whirlwind, yea, when all his hail and his mighty ^cstorm shall beat upon you, it shall have no power over you to drag you down to the gulf of misery and endless wo, because of the rock upon which ye are built, which is a sure foundation, a foundation whereon if men build they cannot fall."

Mood Behaviors Research by the Food Hospital

I came across two videos today that have to do with my blog post on November 6, 2013 about food additives and and the effect on mood behaviors. Kind of hits me that as parents we often punish and give consequences for our kids poor behavior but what if it's a result of what we feed our kids??

Gratitude Shown to Veteran Jim Wolf

Here is a story about hope, gratitude, transformation, respect, and love. One man, Rob Bliss, decided to give back to homeless veterans and create a video because he "...wanted to show how a physical transformation for some people doesn’t cover up who they are, but reveals who they could be." One person was able to show veteran Jim Wolf his potential and at the same time say thanks for his sacrifice for our country.  

that “an outward transformation is important, but an inward one is more important,” Marge Parlmerlee said, the lady in charge of the nonprofit Degage which helps veterans. "She said she hopes it also helps change stereotypes to give people a perspective that 'everyone is worthy of being treated with dignity and respect.'”

"We all know that war wounds are not all external,” Parlmerlee said. (Aren't the  mental health wounds we have internal as well?)

"If I can only get people to look at any homeless person on the street and see the mirror image of them — the image of someone who would look socially acceptable — realize that potential, that ‘what if,’ and root for their success,' Bliss said. You can read the full article that these quotes come from by clicking here 

When I shop downtown I see a lot of homeless people. I feel a Christlike love for them and a strong desire to help so I drop off donations at the homeless shelter. For the past two years after Christmas my family has dropped off sack lunches (with uplifting messages written on the paper sacks) at the homeless shelter. Last year my nieces and nephew got involved and it was a lot of fun to see them get excited about it.

The next time you see someone who may look a little scruffy, 
just remember there is 

             a child of God

                                                              underneath all of that.

My Only Son

I read an article from the Burlington post's blog that I wanted to share. It talks about a feature film about a veteran who comes home from war and has to face the onset of schizophrenia. You can read that article here

I watched the short film that was produced and I have to say I was disappointed and it kind of made me mad. Most feature films are based on those who have schizophrenia. There is a stigma that exists about mental illness and I worry about the public's perception of mental illness after watching this. 

What one person experiences with one specific illness does not mean another person will a completely different illness will experience those same symptoms. Even with the common symptoms associated with each disease doesn't mean a person experiences ALL of them. The one symptom of a manic phase where a person spends money with reckless abandon just makes me laugh because I can be such a penny pincher that I never even came close to that, even when I was first being diagnosed and experiencing mania. 

Most people who think of those who are diagnosed (with any mental illness) and are in their manic state (or what in other ways can be described as their most severe bout with their specific mental illness) hear voices, are violent, hallucinate, cut out articles from newspapers thinking there are codes and secret messages contained inside, etc. Well, I don't hear voices. My illness is very different. I have been diagnosed with bipolar. I experience anxiety and depression. Medication has helped to stabilize the boat and keeps me from having manic episodes and the severe depression. But I still have anxiety and depression. So that is why I look for other ways to help alleviate those symptoms. That is why I study about chemicals contained in processed foods and in products that are easily absorbed into our skin and into the bloodstream. That is why I like to make things from scratch. I cannot control the fact that I have this disease but you better believe I am going to watch what I put into my body. 

Did you know that red #40 causes irritability? (When asked, my little niece will tell you that it makes her "crazy!" It's kind of cute when I hear her say that). According to this website, it can also cause, 

"severe temper tantrums, fidgeting, aggression, inability to focus, and nervousness. The dye has also been linked to physical symptoms such as stomachaches and headaches."

According to this website as a result of what the scientists have found and what the British Food Standards Agency have decided said that, "UK ministers have agreed that the six colorings will be phased out by 2009." So why is the US behind? Why aren't we changing food standards??? I think it will take consumers creating enough fuss and refusing to purchase products containing harmful dyes and additives. 

Those of us with mental illnesses struggle enough as it is, we do NOT need more "stuff" affecting our behavior and how we feel!

___________________________

Anytime I see a misconception on television about mental illness it makes me want to fight even harder to educate the public better. I've received training from NAMI and will continue to receive additional trainings from different resources so I can be a better mental health advocate. I will also continue to advocate medicine compliance, becoming a master of your own brain (putting good thoughts in and getting rid of negative emotions and thoughts), natural medicine like essential oils and homeopathics, and healthy lifestyle changes (not diets, because diets don't work!).

Homemade Deodorant with doTERRA Essential Oils

doTERRA has a recipe for a deodorant just using essential oils that you mix and put in a skinny glass roll-on tube that you can purchase online. I used a recipe from a different company that included ingredients like baking soda and beeswax & I also added some of my oils from doTERRA. I chose to use Purify, Onguard, & Bergamont. I love the smell! And the deodorant works great. You can find the recipe I used here. 

Bacteria is what causes your armpits to smell and the doTERRA essential oils called Purify & Onguard kill the odor causing bacteria. I read that the beeswax acts as an antiperspirant.

When making this recipe, I recommend melting the beeswax first then adding and melting the coconut oil before you add the remaining ingredients. The beeswax took a long time to melt on low heat, but would melt faster if that was the only thing in your pot. 

Have fun making this recipe! I found the beeswax pastilles melt faster, are easier to measure and it is cheaper to buy them through Amazon. 

I was surprised how much it made.
I saved two of my old empty
deodorant/antiperspirant bottles
and still had a 1/2 cup left over.
This deodorant WORKS GREAT and I LOVE it!!

Meet Duck Dynasty's Uncle Si

So I've never watched the Duck Dynasty Show but Uncle Si, in an interview with Fox 411, was very open about his son's mental health struggles and the strain it caused on his marriage. I love it when people are open about mental illness. That takes us one step closer to eliminating the stigma associated with it. The more open and honest people are the more educated the general public becomes.

"FOX411: You were also very honest about your son's mental health issues.
Si: Yeah he had some serious problems. The doctors finally figured out the medicine he needed and then everything was fine. Sometimes it's necessary to medicate.

FOX411: It put a lot of stress on your marriage.
Si: Oh yeah but if you think you're going to go through this life without running into some problems then you need to think again. It's not going to happen."

You can read the full interview here

We All Need Rescuing

We all need rescuing in some form or another. 

Today I was in my kid's school office and I couldn't but overhear this very distraught woman talk about some of the struggles her and her family are going through. She was very emotional and upset. I asked for her name and hope to get the ball rolling to put something together to help out this family. This is what life is all about, finding opportunities to help others and I know Heavenly Father places people in our path who need our help. I'm just glad that I recognized a need and was prompted with an idea on how to help her and get the school involved and that I was NOT too wrapped up in myself and my own problems or things to do. Sometimes it's easy for me to get caught up in my own trials and hurt. But today was different. I hope to be able to help her.

I read an incredible story posted on Facebook. There is also a little video (no sound) that you can watch here. Wow. It made me a little emotional to read. Some people passed right by the woman who was about to jump, but this bus driver stopped immediately, look where he's parked in relation to the woman. He was paying attention to what was in front of him. Let's open our eyes and look for opportunities to help rescue others, everyone needs a pick me up and to know that someone cares. 

Guiding Compass

"The words spoken at general conference should be a compass that points the way for us during the coming months. If we listen to and follow the promptings of the Spirit, they will serve as a Liahona, guiding us through the unknown, challenging valleys and mountains that are ahead."—Dieter F. Uchtdorf, "General Conference—No Ordinary Blessing"

Go here for that guidance through the valleys and mountains in your life.

Comfort and Understanding for those with Mental Illness

I love how bold Elder Jeffery R. Holland was on Saturday as he spoke about mental illness. He speaks with understanding and empathy. He gives hope and comfort. He gives counsel, direction and help. I cried throughout this whole address. Those tears were tears of healing. I encourage you to watch.