Resources

National Mental Health Association

National Alliance on Mental Illness

National Alliance on Mental Illness—Utah Chapter

Above is a list of websites that can help those diagnosed with mental illnesses and their families. There are classes and support groups available.

Comic Relief

My husband and I went on a date last night to see a famous comedian, and it was actually clean comedy!

No dirty jokes, no crude humor...it was GREAT!

This whole past month has just been a lot of emotional upheaval and last night I laughed for about an hour and half straight.

I REALLY needed it!

Humor can heal.

My oldest child was blessed with a good sense of humor and I feel so blessed to be her mother. When she was just 2 months old

I was just holding her when she started to giggle.

So I giggled.

Then she giggled.

And didn't stop giggling.

I love this memory of her.

She has brought laughter, light, and love into our family ever since.

A wise man once said,

"I CAN'T

                          is a QUITTER

                                                   TOO LAZY to TRY"

I'm totally going to use this with my kids! And, more importantly...with myself.

12 Steps Towards Healing

My in-laws served a mission for our church right around the same time that I was experiencing the first of my symptoms of the bipolar disease. They were called to be facilitators for one of the Addiction Recovery Program meetings http://www.providentliving.org/familyservices/strength/0,12264,2873-1,00.html which are sponsored by LDS (Latter-Day Saint) Family Services to help those who struggle with addictions such as:

• Alcohol
• Drugs (both prescription and illegal)
• Tobacco
• Coffee and tea
• Pornography
• Inappropriate sexual behavior
• Gambling
• Codependency
• Disorders associated with eating

They sent me the workbook that the church uses for the 12 Step Addiction Recovery Program and I know they were inspired to do so. At the time they sent it I was in denial about my diagnosis and I was too angry and proud to go through the workbook. So I set it aside and basically forgot about it.

Eight years later I was sitting at our family computer when I looked over at the bookshelf and saw the workbook. As I glanced through the pages I started crying. It was like I was receiving one on one counsel and admonitions from my Father in Heaven about changes that I needed to make in my life.

While I don't have any addictions,

I was amazed at how well this program applied to my struggles with my illness and I felt that it could help me. You can download a copy of the workbook for free at http://providentliving.org/content/display/0,11666,8517-1-4751-1,00.html

I have seen how the 12 Step Recovery Program is helping me in my own life and I know that it will help others. For me it is like a road map to recovery and healing.

Each step includes a key principle, action steps, and a section called study and understanding. The last section is filled with scriptures to study and questions to answer and write down. It helps me to better understand how to apply each step to my life.

Step 1 HONESTY
KEY PRINCIPLE: Admit that you, of yourself, are powerless to overcome your addictions and that your life has become unmanageable.


Step 2 HOPE
KEY PRINCIPLE: Come to believe that the power of God can restore you to complete spiritual health.

Right now I am on: Step 3 TRUST in GOD.

KEY PRINCIPLE: Decide to turn your will and your life over to the care of God the Eternal Father and His Son, Jesus Christ.

I was reading a quote from the Lectures on Faith by our prophet Joseph Smith, Jr.

"Let us here observe, that three things are necessary in order that any rational and intelligent being may exercise faith in God unto life and salvation.

First, the idea that he actually exists.

Secondly, a correct idea of his character, perfections, and attributes.

Thirdly, an actual knowledge that the course of life which he is pursuing is according to his will. For without an acquaintance with these three important facts, the faith of every rational being must be imperfect and unproductive."

As I was reading the second thing that is necessary for faith in God I was struck by the word

"correct."

Sometimes I struggle with trusting my Father in Heaven and I know that it is connected to some INCORRECT ideas I have of God's character, perfections, and attributes.

When I was in college I used to carry my scriptures everywhere with me.

 They had their own little spot in my backpack. If I was feeling discouraged, homesick, anxious or whatever, I would open my scriptures and read.

 I always felt better after doing so. 

A thought occurred to me the other day that the past few years I have been relying too much on my husband for spiritual support and strength and that I needed to get back into the habit I started when I was a freshman in college...meaning, to more often turn towards God through scripture and prayer when I am feeling depressed.

Through the scriptures I will come to better understand CORRECT ideas of my Father's character, perfections, and attributes.

******Side Note: A copy of where and when the 12 Step Addiction Recovery Meetings are in your hometown...
http://www.providentliving.org/ses/emotionalhealth/contact/1,12169,2128-1,00.html

Wise Men STILL seek Him

My husband is such a good example to me of sharing with others. A few weeks ago I asked him if we could buy some Christmas gifts for a needy family in our community. We took our kids shopping with us and made it a fun family activity. Our cart was pretty full with the gifts when my husband grabbed a gift card and added some money to it saying to me, "They could probably use this."


The amazing thing about my husband's generosity is that when I asked him that question a few weeks ago I had no idea about the instability of his own job that he is experiencing lately. (I knew that he was was concerned about his job but I really didn't know the details until recently). When someone is in need, my Mr. doesn't hesitate to help and I love him for it.

The following video contains examples of finding those around us who need our help. I know we can be instruments in our Savior's hands in reaching out to those in need whether it be physical, emotional, or spiritual needs.

http://youtu.be/9OcQXpZwRKY

Who is Mrs. Fuzzle?

What's a fuzzle? Beats me!

Apparently I talked in my sleep a few weeks ago. According to my husband this is what I said,

"I hope the Big fuzzles do their job and I hope the little fuzzles grow into Big fuzzles!"

My Mr. then asked me what a fuzzle was and I just patted his arm. I recalled all of this when he told me and I remember patting his arm reassuringly and I was about to explain but I fell back asleep. My family laughed a lot about our fuzzle story. My oldest thought it was great and kept quoting me all week.

Stabilizing the Boat & Overcoming Bad Habits

(I started this post on 2 Nov 2011 and published it 18 Jan 2012. I'm so used to writing rough drafts before my final "essay." (; And I haven't figured out how to change the date yet!)

A couple of months ago I kept track of how many days I was depressed and how many days where I wasn't. Two months of depression passed and then I had three good days where I felt happy and content. After those three days I slipped back into another cycle of depression.

I was shocked.
It surprised me to see how long the periods of my depression were. 

This pattern was pretty typical. While the medications that I was on helped pull me out of my first (and hopefully last) severe and deep depression, 
I still had some symptoms of depression. 
I thought that this was as good as it was going to get...
it wasn't the deep, deep depression that I had experienced years earlier and for that reason alone I was very grateful.

A few good days and then several days of not wanting to socialize, sleeping longer, and doing what I call "brain dead" activities such as the Internet, the t.v., reading books...things that for me numbed the pain of depression.  While none of these activities I participated in were bad, they became unhealthy coping skills because I did them in excess. I thought I was able to escape for a few moments but in reality I was making my depression worse.

I told myself that something finally needed to be done about this lingering depression so I called my psychiatrist, whom I'll call "Dr. L." My medications were adjusted and those days where I feel depressed have dramatically lessened. Thank heavens for modern medicine. (I am very grateful for the medications that have lessened the severity of the mood swings aka stabilizing my boat). I never knew nor did I expect that I could have this many good days in a row. I still have cycles of depression but they don't last as long.

I am very blessed.


***1 May 2013 I have since learned that medications actually helped stabilize the "boat" of my mental illness symptoms. I feel it is SO IMPORTANT to work together with my Psychiatrist AND THERAPIST. I think mental Illnesses are part "thinking" diseases, aside from the obvious physiological symptoms. Sometimes the way I think and feel about myself or my life is messed up and I need the guidance of a therapist to help straighten me out. (: It is so important to FIGHT against this disease, to seek help from health professionals, to manage your disease and not let it manage you. Everything on my blog is my own opinion and I am not a licensed medical provider. I can only share what I have learned from my own experiences. I made a subconscious decision that I didn't want to wallow in the severe depression anymore. It's very empowering to realize that I can actually fight against this disease because I have PROOF! I am not where I was 10 years ago. I want others who suffer from this horrible disease to 
realize
 that they too have the
 ability and power
 within themselves to fight against mental illness. 
You are empowered. 
You are stronger that you realize.